Now I finally know how to drop the balcony's hard curtains all the way to the floor - it's a big relief for the warmest hours of the day.

The Olympics end today.. watched the clausure Ceremony, maybe for the first time ever. It's chaos and overall feel were similar to the Opening. It was nice to see how all the flags marched ahead and behind them all the athletes walked together, no distinction (or almost none).

The next games will be held in Rio, how cool would it be to actually be there at watch it live for myself? Could that even happen?

Anyway, it's something to look forward to. (That and the TMI movies!)

Finished reading City of Glass, and with that the first trilogy of the Mortal Instruments, at last. Technically there are still three books left now.

Discovered omegle.com yesterday, which sucked me in for the rest of the evening and early morning. It's been a long, long time since I went to bed so late (early). And it was fun while it lasted but it's time to ban myself from the site after the very first day.... cause omegle eats your soul.

I can only visit it again on the next MONTH, period. Please go mantain your regular sleep pattern you lazy brat.

The Olympic games are finally here. Yay there are so many cool things in the world! They are worth living for!

I still think that Beijing's 2008 ceremony was better - this one was a bit chaotic (but cool to watch anyway).

Fever raised again so I just stayed home.

Discovered SimonAndMartina's channel on youtube. Their videos are really entertaining and funny. I found myself summerged in a Kpop Music Mondays marathon. On top of that, Kpop fanservice equals epicness!

Watched Nakedyouth (BL) 10 min animated short film. It filled me with some strange sort of optimism. Kojiro Shishido is cool, that's all.

After that I kept searching for short animations on youtube, all made by animation students, and a few behind the scenes Disney and Dreamworks videos..

Finished reading City of Ashes (which was slightly less entertaining than City of Glass).

It was so hot today I took a shower directly with the bikini on.

It was particularly difficult to get up in the morning. The weather was hot which didn't make it any easier.

Felt kinda sad for a moment cause I couldn't find my USB anywhere. I wondered if I lost it at school, but then miraculously found it at the last minute. Material possessions really are a pain. It's a pain to lose them, to be dependant on them, to see them damaged.. (Now when I think of it, would it also mean that "e-readers are good, books are troublesome"?)

Started watching 3 more anime series in the evening (gosh why so many): Sakamichi no Apollon - plain great, as I already suspected from the previews! Space Brothers, and Another - okayish and supposedly a horror series, though it's not scary at all, at least at the beginning.

I'm trying to continue eating in a healthy way, though reading the food labels gets scarier each time. How do they even manage to put white wine, fructose and a million conservants in foods as simple as a block of wood (like corn or fried tomatoes). The only way to remain perfectly safe is to grow your own goddamn vegetables on the kitchen's windowsill.

Wrote a kind of questionary for myself to decide which degree to take. It was something quite revealing and fun. The ultimate problem solver, "no survey available? Make your own."

I'm tired of being nocturnal. Changing habits is such a painful process. I need to freaking try to get up early everyday. And go to bet earlier as well. When I do, it feels like I'm wasting a still perfectly productive rest of a day. But actually it's the other way around!

Watched all episodes of Saint Seiya Omega currently subbed.. It seems after a long break there comes a period packed with watching anime again.

Today I realized how much I missed hot chocolate. I tried to get over it, but couldn't. Then I ventured to prepare it with actual soy milk, fearing the possible outcome. But it actually tasted great, like 3 times tastier than average hot chocolate, especially if involving flavored soymilk, with hazel nuts or similar.

Went to the mall in the evening spending almost 65,0 on groceries and cosmetic stuff I ran out of.

Started reading a new story at night, The Violet and the Tom (free on the internet) after finding out about it on GR. There were so many admiring reviews that I had to check it out, and indeed the author is a great storyteller! There are so many chapters though, I wonder how much time will it take for me to complete it.

Omega is so different from the original Saint Seiya, and I didn't like the character design at first. But it's not as bad as I expected it to be either, and the opening song is a quite beautiful version of Pegasus Fantasy. So nostalgic maan...

Reading info Pdf's about particularities of the entrance exams makes me wish I was a writer, painter or similar with a simple happy life at my happy little-but-spacious home. I don't need more. Recognized artists who can live off their work and royalties just don't realize HOW lucky they are.

When I think about ALL those college entrance exams my guts fill with fear, boredom and sadness. I need to fix myself up and stop being so worried about this. Maybe I won't get any degree after all, maybe I will later in life, when I'm 30? People say that most degrees are worth nothing and are useless in the long term, anyway.

Saw an old friend from my previous school today, we went to eat. I had lactose-containing food again.
Got an angry-ish mail from the teacher later in the evening, since I forgot to send him certain stuff on time. It made me feel really depressed.

Finished City of Bones..

Read it in 12 days (slow, so slow).. There were things happening all the time, - I was thankful for that after all those slow pace books.

Loads of parallelisms with Harry Potter universe-and-objects. Much work isn't required to recognize many of them.

The author is a BL fangirl! The book is full of soft fanservice at Alec's expense, lolol I bet that if it were in her power she would've whored Alec out with every single male character that crossed his path.

To describe it in a few words - entertaining, Harry Potter ripoff, often funny, reads easily.

Watched the movie Suicide Club / Suicide Circle yesterday night. Sometimes it looks like a parody, sometimes as "serious business", there are quite a few really stupid sequences.. I've red later on a theory of someone that was comparing this movie to the Piper of Hamelin legend, and then all peices suddenly fell into place and everything made perfect sense! The tale's name is even mentioned in the movie. The guy who noticed is a genius.

There is a "reassuring song" in the end which invites you to "leave as you please" (It was nice of them to end it with a little bit of optimism..)

Whenever Eurovision comes I regret it's only "Euro" vision - it would be so fun to watch indian, chinese, north african and mid-eastern candidates.. Maybe they have their own similar shows?

Sweden won, there were like 3 people out of 42 singing in their own languages instead of english. Some of the good ones were from UK, Sweden and Ukraine.

I'm in such need of something sweet that I put sugar in my tea for the first time in several years! Usually I don't put anything in cause it spoils the natural taste.
It's strange how a lack of sugar has the power to put you in a bad mood. But that's good anyway cause I have nothing to eat until dinner and therefore will get a bit slimmer today.. Maybe a few grams. Right?.. (Sure.)

Seriously I envy 8 year old girls cause they're flat and slim without putting in any effort! Then you grow older, you gain weight AND your school homework gradually becomes more complicated. Over the years it's transformation process is like "very easy - easy - normal - difficult - impossible (high school)". The world is unfair.

Ditched class today cause I felt a sudden inspiration to clean the apartment instead and to put together the new year calendar, and a chance like that can't be missed.

I'm done with 1/3 of City of Bones already (don't know if I should be proud about it, some people read so amazingly quickly you have to start wondering if they process all the stuff they read.. How do they do it?..)

It has an embarassing cover to read in public.. When in the subway I keep inclining it at weird angles so people can't see it and assume it's some perverted story (most of those books have exactly this kind of cover design..)

So far Jace reminds me of Malfoy, Simon reminds me of Ron, Isabelle reminds me of Isabel from Shiver and it's weird cause they have a similar personality and pretty much the same name.

Got soaked in the rain while walking from the chinese shop. It was great, I pictured myself in some tropical jungle on a mission.

I'm still considering what degree to choose, but my grades from when I was in school and the constatly running time are giving me a hard reality check. Still don't know what to do.

Mother said I'll be talking to that acquaintance psychologist of hers on the phone, for her to help me decide faster. While many people can normally seek advice from a pro and consider it completely mundane, I kinda feel bad about it cause I can't help seeing them as normal people with plenty of their own problems, and wouldn't feel comfortable talking about things that might sound complainty to a total stranger.

I feel kinda useless when I think about attending art school. I can't help thinking that engineers, doctors, scientists and such are highly needed in our society and are useful and respected human beings while an art student is just.. one out of millions who likes to draw or paint or something among the lines.

 And even if it's funny to read I feel kinda sad when people joke about the average "art student's" future, cause it's what I wanted to do at first, but oh well.. I don't feel that enthusiastic about it, either.

The left hemisphere of my brain behaved so badly (dumb in maths) during high school - is it even normal to think about drastically changing all my (few) plans for a career until now, to actually study some hard science or medicine? Should I go for it?.. I don't know what to do. I feel quite lost.

I kinda regret getting the Wolves of Mercy Falls - now after reading it. There's no way to know you won't like it when you buy it....

I finished it anyway - in a constant struggle and just because I don't like leaving things unfinished and cause I got all three books at the same time. The story was mostly uninteresting and repetitive, aside from the little knots of action and plot progress here and there.

Even though I respect a writer's hard work to finish a book, still I disliked it.. I just want to resell it or give it away now so I don't have to keep it standing together with my other books on the shelves..

Today's lunch a giant salad. Perfect for summer time when all the foods you usually enjoyed during the winter now suddenly make you feel as heavy as a rock..

Nuts are usually untrelated to a salad but I like putting some in, cause they add the perfect crunch (and fat..)

The days are getting unbearebly hot lately. No transition whatsoever, one morning you just have to leave your coat at home, no more hiding behind heavy clothing - now days are passing and I'm getting used to it again.

Procrastination is costly and it's the enemy! Still I can't get rid of it. Lack of control equals lack of money. I need to be more organized and more self-estrict, which I'm not.

Even if it doesn't seem so in the beginning, it's an inversion to be happy in life. The one who needs less stuff to be happy and content is the merriest one, not the one who who has loads of money without even knowing how to spend it..

I need to convince myself as soon as possible, force myself to start seeing things as they are.
At first it never works. You make some neat little schedule but afterwards you forget about it since you feel too lazy and unmotivated to follow it. Most of the time this schedule is way too unrealistic for you to stick up to, so you drop it. Try again and again then, make it less "army style" and more your lazy everyday life, but with the change that, every single day, there will be something you could be proud of. Easier said than done, but.. one step at a time.

Organized people win at everything. I want to be like that too.